Love, actually??

I've been away too long
And every day i missed you more
You look like you did before, only prettier
Every day i love you more
Love you more - Armin Van Buuren

S; aquarius to my gemini, gorgeous in every sense of the word, kind and determined. He is everything I've ever wanted or hoped for in a lover. The only problem is there are some things I didn't want... But nobody's perfect right?

Love is a funny thing. I've had it once before with P. When you're in love you just know... like it's some undeniable force within you. I didn't know it was there with S, in fact I'm pretty sure I knew it wasn't there. S was my play thing. I lusted after him night and day, indulging in the pleasures allowed by his controvercial lifestyle.

It's been 5 months since we've met and they've been anything but long! Time flies when I'm with my alluring lover. After about 3.5 months he told me he loved me, but it was after a night of long partying and I was unsure of his sincerity. Since then we've exchanged the occaisional "I love you" and as time passes it is starting to feel more natural.

I'm scared that I want to love him more than I actually do. But I also know that I'm scared to fall in love... Baggage is a bitch isn't it?